Virginia is a mum of four, columnist and co-founder of Parents Work Collective – a not-for-profit organisation which advocates for policies that better support parents. In 2019, she won the Caroline Jones Women in Media Young Journalist’s award! Virginia’s latest project has been focused on getting her book funded & in the hands of the public. It’s called: All Mother’s Work. Given the perceived uncomfortable topics that are discussed her book, Virginia found that traditional publishers were not willing to take on this ‘risk’. This hasn’t stopped her though and All Mothers Work is on track for being self-published in early 2025. Read about her journey and how you can help support this book that I’m sure mothers everywhere will resonate with. But first …
Virginia’s favourite book from childhood?
The Magic Unicorn by Caroline Repchuk
Virginia’s kids favourite picture books?
Gus Dog Goes To Work by Rachel Flynn, illustrated by Craig Smith
In this Article
Virginia Tapscott
I’m Virginia and I live on a farm in southern NSW with my husband and our four kids. I studied Journalism and worked in ABC radio for a few years before I started writing for a country paper. When we started a family I transitioned to freelance work which helped me balance family life and career aspirations. I have moved away from reporting and now work mostly in advocacy or writing columns for The Australian. It was through my columns that I first realised I could write a book.
A can of worms
The response to my columns about better supporting motherhood and parenting was huge. I hit a nerve with parents all over the world who knew the system was failing but had felt powerless to voice this or perhaps unsure of realistic solutions to pursue. I knew I had opened a can of worms so complex that it could only be properly addressed in book form.
Uncomfortable conversations
These discussions, particularly around raising children, motherhood and gender equality, can be uncomfortable and nuanced which makes them unsuitable for usual media and social media platforms.
It’s difficult to be critical of the system parents are operating within without this being interpreted as criticising parents and particularly mothers. So often, parents and mothers don’t realise they are taking personal responsibility for systemic problems, which makes us very reactive to discussions in this space.
The [true] cost of parenting
I was desperate to move the conversation forward by helping parents easily identify the systemic failures and how these affected their daily lives on an individual level. The book examines fundamental flaws in our current approach to parenthood which is simply minimising the amount of time we spend parenting in order to minimise the disadvantage that comes with care contributions.
Rather than actually identifying care work as a non-negotiable human need, we simply tell parents to do less of it.
I recognised a huge need to illustrate the importance of the care work parents do, how critical this is to our societal wellbeing and empower parents with solutions that could actually improve their overall parenting experience. I also illustrate the costs of having less time to care for each other.
If parents knew how badly current policy was failing them and future generations, they would demand different policy.
The (de)value of motherhood and care work
The book weaves in my own personal experiences by examining how I came to devalue care work and motherhood in my own life but also how this played out on a societal level. We then look at what we can do to address the devaluation of care and parenting. I put forward individual, policy level and even market-based solutions which can address the isolation and lack of support being experienced by parents and particularly mothers.
Finding a solution
I was proud of the research and groundwork I did to come up with a constructive response to an extremely vexed issue. I tried to focus on solutions and ways to move forward but then I realised solutions always start with properly recognising the problem.
Sadly, publishing houses were not ready to recognise the truth of the problem...
… that children and parents are suffering in current early years models that claim to address problems related to declining childhood outcomes and gender equality issues. They weren’t ready to consider that the childcare and family policy system we have in Australia needs a complete overhaul and that parental support policies are inadequate.
I think people in positions of power and influence are avoidant of the fact that many parents have absolutely no choice but to return to paid work before they were ready.
Self-publishing All Mothers Work
When I realised that a small group of elite gatekeepers were controlling the message, informing policy development and unwilling to consider alternatives, I became determined to self-publish. The policy settings we have actually result in strongest benefits for a small group of elite men and women who do not feel the choice to care for our children is worth supporting or defending.
I felt it was my duty to be a voice for the masses – middle and low income parents who are much more heavily impacted by issues like poor quality childcare or lack of family support payments than high income earning parents who can afford private Nannies and do not experience the same level of financial strain. The media is overrepresented by parents who are more buffered from the pitfalls of a dual income society.
Crowdfunding All Mothers Work via Kickstarter
The board of Parents Work Collective got behind my book and Tara Shelton from Motherism designed the book cover, which was so important in creating a vision for me to continue working towards.
We decided to crowdfund via Kickstarter to take it from draft form to polished, published hard copy. The chapters will be released as a series before being professionally edited and published. So far it has undergone a kind of group approach to editing where a google document is shared with a focus group who can comment on the document and provide feedback.
Self-publishing needs self-determination
I wrote the book last year but I would have abandoned if it wasn’t for the support of other women who believed it was worth publishing. Feedback and someone to keep you accountable is vital in the writing process. It’s worth trying to recruit someone you know and trust to help with this. Having people who believe in your book is so important. In total the book will have taken 18 months to write and publish. I reached critical mass, the point at which I knew I had gone far enough into the book to complete it, after a year of infrequent writing. Books feel impossible until you have finished the first draft.
The hardest thing about self-publishing is self-motivation. Remaining accountable when you have no guarantee of ever finished or getting published takes a leap of faith.
Demanding a different future
Having the confidence of finishing this book, I will move onto completing my novel which I have started. I am looking forward to taking a step back in the advocacy space and letting the book speak for itself.
I’ve said what I have to say on the topic.
We now need others to join the movement and demand a different future for our children.
The book will be available in February next year.
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Parents Work Collective
For more information about Parents Work Collective – visit the website here.
Thank you for sharing your process to becoming a self-published author with Birchy’s Books, Virginia. So excited to see your book out there on shelves next year! Remember – if you would like to support Virginia and her movement in creating positive change for mothers and caregivers – the best thing you can do is to order a copy of her book via Kickstarter.
